Are You Trapped In Your Own Life?

trapped-womanDo you feel like you’re living someone else’s life? When you were young did you imagine that you’d be doing what you’re doing now? What happened? Was it all someone else’s fault or do you have to take some level of responsibility in it too?

The sense of feeling trapped is more common that you’d think. There are times in every life when you’ve gone with the flow and suddenly find yourself stuck in a hole that seems far too deep to get out of. Even the idea of escaping sounds like it’s forbidden, as if in some way your breaking the rules.

The fact is that there are no rules, there’s only the excuses that you’re putting up in front of you to stop you from taking a risk. Seriously, what’s the worst that can happen if you lose everything? All you’ll have to do is build it up again and if you’ve been stuck in a crappy career for years then the one thing you know how to do is build it up slowly.

The trapped feeling doesn’t come from outside, you’ve constructed it by making the excuses so significant that it’s almost laughable to accept that anything else could be possible. Through your fears and your conditioning you have put up enough reasons why you should never take a risk, but without taking a risk your life will just exist until you die.

It doesn’t even feel like you have anything to lose, it’s a trap with foot-high walls. On one side you have a career that makes you miserable but it pays your bills in a modest affordable house, with your 6 year old car and enough money to go on holiday for 2 weeks a year; on the other side you have a life full of potential, true happiness, a life that feels like you’re on holiday everyday, a purpose, no rules. But you can’t take the leap from one to the other because you’re scared that it might not work.

Guess what? You might get run over tomorrow. There was a woman on the Titanic that refused her dessert. What’s the security that you have where you are at the moment, and who holds that security? If you’re an employee then the chances are that you constantly spend your time watching an axe swing ever nearer anyway.

Money is the main reason why you can’t even consider making a leap. As if you’re Donald Trump at the moment and so by leaving your job you could lose millions. Right? Wrong. The leap is never about stupidly quitting a job, rushing out into the big unknown void and then panicking about what you’re going to do. It’s about preparing, thinking, measuring, calculating, solving, but if you have a positive intention then all of your excuses can be worked around, even money. However, even if you plan as much as possible there will still come a point when you’re going to have to close your eyes and take a leap of faith. The good news is that it’s a faith in yourself and that’s the one thing that you can control.

You’re not trapped so you don’t need to escape. You just need to start living the life that you were meant to, rather than just the first one that came along.


5 responses to “Are You Trapped In Your Own Life?

  1. Good stuff Mike.
    No…………….not trapped now but once had that feeling when working full time, caring for sick husband and raising noisy boys!
    You’re right…’s choices that we make that create our lives.
    I chose to retire early (got the chance through a voluntary redundancy programme)
    Doing the real sums re affordability was actually quite refreshing. It cut out SO much wasted expenditure!
    Now I live happily half way up a mountain, in a wet and very rural part of Ireland, miles away from family and some good friends. Family moved off shortly after I did so now our whole family is all over the world! They made choices too!
    Now we grow our own food, involve ourselves with community life as and when we wish, shout at the radio (that’s nothing new), and live each day for it’s own value……tomorrow never comes as it’s already here!
    Planning is the key……….it helps manage the risk!
    now get on with that book (s)!

  2. Great blog. I think a lot of people will relate to it. And I think a lot of people may need to read that last line. This blog reminded me of a poem. Hope you don’t mind:


    When all is in view.
    When nothing seems new-
    it’s unrecognisable as you.

    You see all that’s been lost and all that’s been found.
    All that’s been used, abused – turned around.
    The glass rut is bound with routine,
    but no sound.

    Look at life’s box; it’s your store.
    Can cram in no more?
    Can’t shut the door with the life of before?
    Perhaps it’s time to move the sill,
    time to ask for the bill?
    For the life of before.

    Tear off life’s receipt.
    Cool off.
    There’s no heat in this seat.

    Doesn’t mean you’re ripping past loves apart.
    The person you are – you’ll hold them close to your heart.

    Come step up to the line.
    In front shows a NEW time.
    An area to fill with your talent,
    your goodwill.

    May take life’s course,
    to embrace the strange.
    Just call it your wind of change.
    And start new.
    First step?
    That’s you.

  3. No problemo. This was actually written for a friend of mine who was going through alot of what you mentioned above.

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